Your sex and dating questions answered

Dr. Pam's solution:
Please reassure yourself that you and a million other guys ask these questions all the time. You can avoid awkward silences with a couple of tips: always come prepared with a few things you can chat easily about - the last film you saw, your favourite TV programme, your last holiday, the last time you ate at a restaurant, etc. You can double up conversational opportunities by asking her about these things.
That brings me to the next point - turn the spotlight on her and you'll feel less shy/worried. Ask her how she found, e.g. the pub you're in. Ask if she had to travel far, if she saw X, Y or Z programme or likes a particular band, etc.
Chatting to a woman is far easier than you think - if you're interested in her she'll be more interested in you.
The best way to approach a girl is in a straightforward way. There is no need for chat-up lines! A straightforward and classic, "Have you been here before, does it get busy later, etc." is great!
If she's not interested, move on, it happens all the time and nothing to worry about.
Finally you can get her to be attracted to you by being kind, enjoying a laugh, being interested in her as I said, and making the moves like asking for her phone number. We make these things more difficult than they are.
The question:
What do I do when my girlfriend of 10 months doesn't want to see me after a 2 month gap of seeing each other after I finished my studies at University? I bring up the situation of wanting to see her but the question either gets ignored to a different subject or we get into an argument!
Help would be much appreciated.
Dr. Pam's solution:
You're finding what so many others do - people's feelings change and for many different reasons. You can have the deepest love and then one or both people find they eventually grow apart. The fact that she doesn't want to see you shows that her feelings have changed in some way.
I definitely recommend asking her if she'll simply discuss it on the phone rather than keep pushing to see her. She probably feels bad about things changing and that's why she doesn't want to actually face you. If you can find the strength to do things on her terms she'll appreciate it and be much more likely to be honest with you.
Sometimes the things we hope for most don't work out. That can be a very difficult thing to accept. But get to the bottom of it even on the phone if you have to. Tell her you're prepared for the worst but it will help you move on if you know what's really on her mind.
Very best of luck with that!
The question:
I have a woman who wants to go to bed with me, but I'm worried as I have a small penis. How can I avoid embarrassing sex disasters.
Dr. Pam's solution:
What you consider being on the small size may not technically be out of the normal range. The so-called "average" non-erect penis is 8.5 - 10.5 cm long from base to tip (3 - 4 inches) - most men being around 9.5 cm (3.75 inches). The so-called "average" erect penis is 15 - 18.5 cm long from base to tip (6 - 7 inches).
However considering the internal "barrel" of the woman is around three to five inches long, a man who is, for example, three inches when erect can stimulate her fully.
The crucial thing is to stop focusing on your size - you are far more than your penis size and if she is a worthy woman she will believe that. Also start focusing on becoming the King of foreplay. If you can tease her and please her with your hands or mouth before full sex even starts you'll be a king in her eyes!
Definitely experiment with positions to see what works best for you both. Slow and sensual spoons can work well.
Good luck with getting good at foreplay and experimenting with optimal positions.
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